A while ago I learnt a very hard lesson about worry. I was expecting something really important and after doing all that was required, I got “concerned” and thought I should have a “plan b”. I have since learnt that sometimes when I think I am “concerned” about something, I should make sure I am not hiding worry under a different name.
This worry led me to do so many things in the hopes of securing every angle to determine a positive outcome to my expectation. I went through unnecessary hassles, sleepless nights, loads of self imposed tasks and many more things which I wish I had never gotten into. I did not think my actions were as a result of worry, I thought I was being “proactive”.
When I finally got what I was looking for, I saw that I had allowed worry get a grip on me and cause me to venture into stuff I had no need for. I had allowed worry rob me of my faith and take me through a long hard road, a road that did not lead to the result I had hoped for. If only I had rested in God, I would have saved myself from the laborious path I had chosen.
If I had taken time to listen to God and know that Plan A was His idea and that it was secure, the toil towards Plan B would have never occurred.
Why Do People Worry?
Worry is always a result of fear and a lack of trust in God. These are often at the root of every worried heart. We know God promises by His Word and we know He is capable of fulfilling His promises. So why do we not rest in confidence?
It is because that sort of puts us out of control, and we do like to be in control. We want to “do something” to “make it happen”. I believe that we should not be passive about God’s promises. We have to “do something” and that something we need to do is essentially to believe and trust God.
Allow your trust in God and His Word to be so rooted that no matter what you see, hear, or feel, you remain at peace.
Those who trust in the LORD Are like Mount Zion, Which cannot be moved, but abides forever. Psalm 125:1 NKJV
God commands us not to worry about anything:
Do not be anxious or worried about anything, but in everything [every circumstance and situation] by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, continue to make your [specific] requests known to God. Philippians 4:6 AMPC
The Worry About Getting Married
The wait to be married can bring on a lot of pressure, either from the society or even from one’s mind. But worrying never changes anything.
You cannot add any time to your life by worrying about it. Matthew 6:27 NCV
Worrying never results to good… not for the spirit, soul or body. Health experts have linked illnesses to worry and anxiety, it is a silent killer. It steals joy and peace from one’s soul. It drains faith from one’s spirit and hinders God’s word from finding expression in our life.
God’s word is dependable! If He could create this entire universe by His word… your marriage is too small a matter to be worried about.
Instead of worrying and getting anxious about marriage, believe God’s word, trust in Him and rest. When you do…
…the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7 NKJV
All the energy worrying uses up can be channeled towards the pursuit of God’s purpose and calling for your life. In fact, you receive God’s promises as you pursue His purpose.
Seek first God’s kingdom and what God wants. Then all your other needs will be met as well. Matthew 6:33 NCV
Marriage is God’s promise and He alone can make it happen. All you need to do is believe for it, and allow His word to order your steps. When you do that, you place yourself in a position to receive from Him that which He has promised.
Worry Is A Time and Energy Thief
If I had not allowed worry to drive me into pursuing “Plan B” which was all my idea. I would have invested that time and energy in pursuing some of the dreams God had placed in my heart, things I really am passionate about but had to put on hold because I let worry drive me.
In your desire for marriage. Refuse to let worry rob you of the things you would have achieved if you had rested in God knowing that He will bring your marriage to pass.
Do not be so consumed with the desire to get married that it becomes all you live for.
How To Defeat Worry
Take Your Worry To God
Whenever I am worried or afraid, I find that going before God and telling Him of my fears or worries helps. But I do not end there, I also, tell him I cast it on Him because I know He cannot lie concerning what He has promised.
Casting all your cares [all your anxieties, all your worries, and all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares about you [with deepest affection, and watches over you very carefully]. 1 Peter 5:7 AMP
For I know the plans and thoughts that I have for you,’ says the LORD, ‘plans for peace and well-being and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 AMP
Keep Your Eyes On His Word/His Promise
For as many as are the promises of God, in Christ they are [all answered] “Yes.” So through Him we say our “Amen” to the glory of God. 2 Corinthians 1:20 AMP
Another way to defeat worry is by keeping God’s Word before you at all times. Of course I do not mean holding up the Bible in your face every and any where you go. By storing it up in your heart and keeping it on your lips you displace worry. Whenever you see yourself drifting into worry, draw from God’s word stored in your heart and strengthen your faith. Allow God’s word to fill your heart so much so that there is no room for worry. When worry comes trying to creep in, push it back and away with God’s promise as written in His word.
Guard Your Spirit/Heart
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23 NIV
Refuse to reinforce worry by exposing yourself to negative people and words. The people and words you surround yourself with or allow in your space, will affect your faith. They will either strengthen or drain your faith.
Be Thankful and Praiseful
When we are thankful, when we praise God, we invoke God’s manifest presence. We know that no darkness can stand God’s presence. When worry wants to invade your mind, start thanking and praising God for His word, for His promises. The spirit of worry cannot stand the presence of God.
The mountains melt like wax at the presence of the LORD, At the presence of the Lord of the whole earth. Psalm 97:5 NKJV
Remember that you cannot change anything by worrying. Worry will set you back by causing you to spend time and energy trying to “make your marriage happen”. Whilst if you trust God and wait on Him, you will use that the same time and energy to pursue and accomplish God’s purpose for your life.
It is best to rest in God and His promises concerning marriage and channel your energy into pursuing His purpose as you wait for His promise.